The Floral CEO

Hello flower friends.

This is Jen and you are listening
to the Floral CEO podcast.

On this week's episode, I wanna talk
about something that, again, is not talked

about enough, and that is loneliness.

As a small business owner, we
often have all worked in this.

Team environment or a small team,
or a huge corporate culture.

And so we're used to, for one,
just being around other humans.

And I know like when I quit corporate
and went into, you know, really

embracing motherhood, um, after Bodhi
was born and you know, just not going

to work, not being around other people
like I missed being around grownups.

It was weird because I love being a
florist and I love being, you know,

a small business owner, but I missed
that connection of just hearing what

everybody's weekend was and hearing
like about something that happened and

talking to customers all the time and
like I just missed interaction and then.

You know, I often over the years have
just struggled to have friends that were

as driven as I was who got that I wanted
bigger, more badass things in for my life.

They literally, you are the sum of the
five people that you hang around a lot

and over the years, like that person
that what I was around a lot just.

Wasn't in alignment with where I'm
going and I try to operate my life

as the f future version of myself,
not the version of I am today.

So like if I want to be someone who
is fit, who is, um, you know, like

striving to be healthier, like I am
not going to keep donuts in the house.

I am going to try to be that future
version of myself that is fit, that

is healthier, that has those things
that are going to help support that.

And so if you are struggling and feeling
lonely as in your business, maybe even

in your life, in this world we are
in right now, especially after COVID,

the world is fucking weird you guys.

Like I was thinking about all the things
that have changed since COVID and I was

thinking about how communication has
changed and how like people just text

each other and like even in the next
room, someone would text that other person

instead of just having a conversation.

And that just wasn't the case before.

Like people actually connected.

With humans on a different level,
and I think that that is disconnected

us from that human connection and
has further really sunk us into

this loneliness kind of factor.

And so it's completely normal.

You have a lack of coworkers
to celebrate your wins or vent.

Vent frustrations with you have this.

You should be grateful that you're
doing this, so you can't even admit

that you're lonely because you
are living this idealistic dream

of being a small business owner.

But there can be serious
impact to being lonely.

I mean, like mental health is something
that, especially after COVID has

seriously just like gone off the deep
end for so many people and has, as

someone who is, you know, witnessed.

Serious mental health.

I lost my sister to suicide the
week I graduated high school.

So like I have seen the
impact mental health.

I've, you know, been surrounded
by people in my, my mother, my

father, both serious alcoholics.

I've, I've seen how mental health
can impact and loneliness can

have a very negative impact.

It's can lead to overthinking,
self-doubt, burnout.

And you know, you would think that
you're being surrounded by clients or

employees or social media followers,
but yet you feel super unseen.

Like you're posting all the highlight
reels on Instagram and nobody knows

the shit sandwich you feel like, and
sometimes you, you know, feel all

this weight and this responsibility
in this business and you are.

Basically holding all
of that weight yourself.

And that can also be
super, I mean, super hard.

And I think that one thing that needs to
change is that I know here in Minnesota

and you guys, if you're listening to
the podcast for a while, I have worked

really hard in the Minnesota market.

That community over competition is, I say,
is alive and well in Minnesota because

I have tried to help build this support
network of florist supporting florists.

And then in the floral CEO
Mastermind, I have created a

container that I wish I had.

I love the honest conversations
in there, the like.

How the fuck do you do this?

Like I got this and I don't know
what to do, or I want to get here

and I don't know how to get here,
and you guys like, I'm stuck.

I'm having a hard day.

Like there has been so many different,
like I can even see like when

one of the girls is, is really.

Just having a hard time, like, because
I know them so well and I can see the

shift and I wanna help dig them out
because I know that that community

and that support and that that really,
that person being, you know, your

wing man and building your business,
I know how it can change everything.

So if you are struggling in finding
connection as a business owner.

Like, try to find another florist friend.

Try to find a, a, a coaching group.

I mean, try to try find Facebook groups.

Hopefully not ones that
are, but definitely join the

floral CEO Facebook group.

And then if you really need that
ne next level support, or you just

wanna bring your business to the next
level, the floral CEO Mastermind.

You can go check out at floral
ceo.com/mastermind, find a mentor,

find a business bestie who just gets
you there is, I have so many industry

friends that are like photographers,
videographers, makeup, like all of these

people are just like this little network
of amazingness and that makes me feel so.

Like everything is so much fuller
because I have so many friends that

if I wanna figure something out and
the same thing goes for them, like I

have a videographer friend that's done
several of my, my workshops, the, the

video shoots there and he's just like,
Hey, I have a business question and.

I just, I called him and I
was like, Hey, what's up?

And he is like, this happened with
a client, you know, what would I do?

And he's like, explaining the client.

I'm like, she sounds bad.

Shit crazy.

I know you have a contract, but I
wouldn't touch it with a 10 foot

pole because she sounds like she's
going to make your life difficult.

But if you don't ever even have an
opportunity to ask anybody's opinion,

like you are just like sitting
in this loneliness of not having

anybody to bounce anything off of.

Okay.

Then you really need to set boundaries
with relationships that drain you.

I have had numerous friends who, and
even my family, who just don't get it.

They just don't get what
you're trying to accomplish.

They just don't get that.

You don't wanna work an eight to five job.

They just don't get that.

You have this fucking dream.

They just want you to be safe.

They want you to be small.

And it's okay for you to be done
with that and, and protect yourself

that this person just doesn't get it.

And that's okay.

I still love them, but I don't
have to invite them into that part

because when you're lonely and then
you have that, it's compounded to

this unhealthy, you feel like shit.

You feel like you're
doing the wrong thing.

They maybe unintentionally
are making you feel.

That way or you've just developed
this one-sided relationship because

you really just don't want any input
from them about anything because you

find no value in what they have to
say 'cause they just don't get it.

So learning to value, quality over
quantity on, so in your social

connections in and really just who you're
connecting with in general because.

You are the sum, like I said earlier,
are the five people you're around most.

So if you had, and I had this, I
had a person that had their fist up

wanting to fight the world all the
time, which is exhausting to be around.

Everybody has ill intentions,
also exhausting to be around.

The world is full of fucking idiots.

I can't believe this person did this and
did you know this and did you know this?

And like all this just like
deep level, crazy shit.

It is exhausting.

That is like, think of a leach
and you just put like every time

they're bitching or complaining.

And I think that there can be a
balance because obviously everybody

needs to vent sometimes, but if you
have that person, like you just dumped

a bucket of fucking leeches on you.

And it's just sucking the life outta you.

Done not doing it, done not helpful.

So you need to do and be
around people who light you up.

Um, we just had, uh, somebody come back to
the mastermind after they had been in it

for a year because they're ready to bring
their business again to the next level.

They're ready to grow.

But also like that energy of
being around people is so helpful

as a business owner because.

You're like, am I crazy for thinking
of this and having that, that kind of

venue to even be able to talk about that.

All right, then here are some
things to really just like actual

strategies to combat loneliness.

Start your morning off with
a check-in with yourself.

Journaling, affirmations, gratitude.

Uh, I know that it's been really helpful
for me to have kind of consistent,

like just, I'm gonna go and network.

I'm gonna go and see a friend.

I'm gonna go, like, I just had my
friend Alexander Robin, um, come

down to the farm and like, she took
farm pictures and all these things.

So like scheduling, like regular
connection with another flower friend,

with another business owner, with another
wedding professional, whatever it is.

Then look at joining local or online
communities for entrepreneurs.

If there's Facebook groups, the floral
CEO mastermind industry meetups like we

have in here in Minnesota, we have ia, we
have wpa, we have, um, Minnesota Bride.

They're having like their best of, so
you get to go fancy dressed up next week.

Like there are so many
things that are out there.

But a lot of times we're scared shitless
to go to any of these things, and that's

where we could find our biz bestie.

So getting a little bit uncomfortable
to potentially, you know, make a

friendship that could either impact,
you know, your, your business from

a friendship standpoint or from a
business standpoint is so important.

So just a reminder, you are not alone.

Many business owners.

I'm talking, I, I'm saying many
because I have coached so many of them.

It is normal to feel alone if you are,
even if you wanna send me a dm. Yep.

I am feeling really, really lonely in
my business and I don't know what to do.

It is totally okay.

If you wanna send me a dm, I'm always
here to listen, but like tell someone.

If you don't get it out of your,
your brain, if you don't get it

out, like nobody's gonna know
that you're feeling this way.

And especially if you're one
of those people that just says,

I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine.

Like fine is not good and
you deserve better than fine.

Then I know when I shifted to
creating consistent connections

with other business owners and.

The quality of my connections
removing negative.

Um, like the world is on fire,
like the apocalypse is next week.

Type people.

If you have those people in
your life, I know it's scary.

'cause you know what I thought is
I'm not gonna have a best friend or

I'm not gonna have a lot of friends.

I'm, I'm, maybe I'm being difficult.

Maybe I'm being the one
that's not really getting it.

You get it.

You, uh, your opinion is the opinion
that matters and driving, you know,

those decisions to be in alignment with
who you are long term is going to be

so giving and is going to make, I mean,
it's evolved me into the person I am now.

I am so passionate about so many
things, but I'm not passionate about

chasing everybody's problems because.

Then I'm never fixing my own,
I'm never impacting the problems

that I could actually impact, and
that is been so helpful for me.

Instead of like just chasing
the world, I, I am really

nurturing the world that I'm in.

So thank you so much for listening.

I hope that this little message was
encouraging if you are alone because.

We all are alone at some point,
but we all have the power to shift

that, and I am here to support you.

Thank you so much for listening,
flower friends, and you have

an amazing flower filled week.